FINDING YOUR HEALTHY BOUNDARIES 

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PHYSICAL HEALTH

1. How do I want to eat?  What kinds of food make me feel happy and healthy?  What kinds of foods make me feel heavy, sluggish or depressed?

2. When are the best times for me to eat?  As soon as I wake up?  Just before bed? 

3. How often does my body want to eat and how much at each meal?  Do I feel better when I eat 3 large meals or 6 small ones?

4. What kinds of exercise makes me feel healthy and strong?

5. What other benefits does exercise bring me (i.e., stress-relief, time alone, etc.)?

6. How often does my body want to exercise?  For how long?

7. Do I prefer variety or consistency in exercise?

8. How much rest do I need to feel healthy and happy?  Do I feel better when I go to bed early?  Wake up early?  Take frequent breaks to re-center?  Take a nap?

9. What kinds of food or substances does my body reject? 

 

EMOTIONAL HEALTH

1. What kinds of experiences bring me joy?  When am I happiest?

2. When do I feel most creative?

3. Where can I most easily express myself?

4. What creative outlet brings me the most satisfaction?

5. How much music do I want in my life?  How much dance?

6. Where do I feel most centered and happy?  In nature?  In a public park or venue?  In my own home when no one is home?  Out with friends?

7. When do I laugh?  What kinds of things make me laugh?

8. What do I do when I’m angry?  What constructive way could I express my anger?

9. How do I handle negative or inconvenient emotions?  How could I be kinder to myself when I’m struggling with negative emotions?

 

MENTAL HEALTH

1. What challenges me mentally?  What activities can I do to stay mentally sharp?

2. What have I always wanted to learn about?  What’s stopping me?

3. How much time do I need to sit and think?   To meditate?

4. How much TV watching is healthy for me?  How much reading?

5. Would journaling help me understand myself better?  How much time am I willing to commit to it?

6. How can I handle the resistance that’s bound to come up?  Can I find a way to give myself space and also hold myself accountable?

7. How do I recharge myself?  How often do I need to do this to feel healthy and balanced?

8. What quiets my mind? 

 

RELATIONAL HEALTH

1. How much alone time do I need?

2. Do I ever feel merged with my partner or friends?  If so, why and when does this happen?  What could I do to lovingly create more separation?

3. How often do I want to socialize?  How much is too much?  How much is too little?

4. What kinds of social activities do I most enjoy? 

5. How do I feel around large groups?  Small groups?  One-on-one?   

6. How much physical intimacy do I want or need to feel connected?  How much is too much?  How much is too little?

7. What kind of intimacy feels healthy and loving to me? 

8. How much excitement do I want in my relationships?  How much is too much excitement?  How much is too little?

9. What role does aggression and personal will play in my relationships?

10. How free do I want to be in relationship?  How much freedom am I willing to give my partner?

 

SPIRITUAL HEALTH

1. How do I connect with my divine spirit? 

2. When do I feel full of awe? 

3. When does life feel most meaningful?

4. What spiritual practice feels most comfortable and in alignment with who I am?  Prayer?  Meditation?  Attending church?  Giving my time to help others?  Yoga?  Dancing?

5. How much time do I need to devote each day in order to feel connected to the divine within me?

6. How can I honor my soul each day?

7. What practical things can I do to make my spiritual practice a priority?